I had a flashback

I had a flashback
I had a flashback. A flashback of life before I was a mother. It was like a vivid dream. I am sitting here with my cup of coffee staring at the open space in front of me as my memory runs back in time.  Let me introduce you to my thoughts.
I am Shalini, 24 years of age and I work as a model. My life was attachment free, all about that ‘spiritual life’ everyone speaks of.Happily married. And then I found out that I was expecting.  Everything seemed to hit a note in my head as I found out I was pregnant.  It was Fear, Fear of the unexpected. Would I survive this task? Would I fail? What is motherhood like?  So many questions were there that I wanted answers; where can I find answers? Maybe I should Google them? At the same time I was happy, so happy.That was two years ago and today I look back at those concerns, both positive and negative prior to getting pregnant.  And I am in a safe position to let you know that being pregnant is a blessing in disguise. As I said before, I too wasn’t sure if I was capable of being a mother since it is a huge responsibility. Most of all, I worried about the physical state I would have to undergo. I know most of my friends who live in a fear of getting pregnant because they will have to give up their ‘Figure’ and all the other external attachments that comes along with being pregnant.   Just like all of you, I too worried about the tiny details such as stretch marks, loss of freedom, feeling older and more mature, losing identity, 24/7 responsible for another human being etc. Yes it was an overwhelming thought. I was definitely sure that I am not capable of taking care of another person let alone myself.  I also worried if having a child would affect my marriage in a negative manner.

And the answer to all the questions is a simple ‘NO’. Having a baby is the best achievement a woman could ask for.  Your life would take a complete change from selfish, independent, and irresponsible to selfless, dependent, responsible and sensible.  Becoming a mother has made me grow up and live life in a whole different aspect. Yes of course I had stretch marks and those little concerns that I worried prior to having my first son but the good news is I managed to snap back to my old size (UK 6) in a matter of 2 months which obviously means that it is possible to be back in those jeans you worried you would probably never get in to.  And as I am writing this, I have given birth less than 5 months ago to my second son and I am already in shape to go back on to a fashion walk.  Which means I managed to snap back in to a size 6 AFTER my SECOND BABY. If you are now wondering if I did any surgery or any other methods available today, the answer to that thought is ‘NO’. I worked hard each day to achieve the body image that I feel comfortable in. If you are comfortable in being thin, fit, curvy, plus size it is your call.  What is beautiful to you is what you should account for. My point is that,don’t be afraid to enter motherhood because you will realize that it is the best decision you’ve made throughout the years.  Nothing made more sense in my life than having my two adorable and equally naughty sons.  This article is to wake up all of the ladies out there who refrain from having children simply because of reasons that doesn’t matter in the longer run. So, think about it and change your inner thoughts for the better.  Trust me you will not regret the idea of ‘motherhood’.
Shalini Mclane

Shalini is a former contributor at Nerdynaut staff.

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  1. Mendela

    April 28, 2016 at 10:38 am

    Wow awesome article

  2. Yuki

    April 28, 2016 at 10:59 am

    Time to be a mother ?thanks for cheering up ?

  3. Romena

    April 28, 2016 at 9:01 pm

    I am really enjoyed your article. Few day to be a mother. I am also shivering. Thanks for you motivational words shalini. Love this article

  4. Chathurie Niluka Nupearachchi

    April 29, 2016 at 6:07 am

    The entry article to Nerdynaut is really interesting Shalini! Please share more such experiences with us.You are a wonderful mom. Even the mother’s day is near by. Thank you so much for highlighting the importance of motherhood. Well done!

    • Trnita

      April 29, 2016 at 10:24 am

      Agreed my dear

  5. Upeksha

    May 1, 2016 at 8:26 am

    Thank you Madam Shalini for sharing your personal thoughts and experiences with everyone in this way…
    Really wonderful…
    May the Holly Mother Bless you always…

  6. Lee

    June 4, 2016 at 4:18 pm


  7. Lee

    June 4, 2016 at 4:23 pm

    Kinda pathetic to read this.cause I know this person who sleeps around in college and then got knocked up.and then only got married.quite a spin in the story.i also know this person doesn’t eat anythg.only liquid diet. What a joke.

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