Dream – simple yet complicated, regular yet unusual, easy yet tricky….
All these words can be associated with dreams. We all have dreams, we all have dreamt before, we all wish to fulfil those dreams of ours. But only a few reach to their destination of the dream.
Dream is not what you see in sleep
Dream is the thing which doesn’t let you sleep
-Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam
Like each one of us, I had a dream too. A dream of becoming a singer, a great singer. I have a good voice and the basic knowledge about music. I used to take part in all singing competitions in school and have won most of them. I love singing so much where I can sing for the entire day and still do not get bored of it. I love to learn and explore more about singing and the more I indulge into it, the more it fascinates me.
But of course, life could not go on like that. Apart from singing, I had to concentrate on the other stuff as well. And of course, the other stuff meant studies and only that. In your initial years of school, you are expected to do a lot of extracurricular activities but as you reach to higher classes, the only thing which remains is studies. The rest of all activities take a backstage in your life and from there onwards there are new plans for your life. So, I had no option but to concentrate more on studies than singing. When you go to higher classes, the studies become tougher. Hence, you have to devote more time to the studies and the rest of all activities doesn’t matter that much. Taking a formal training in music was out of the question as I used to get chances to perform in school competitions. Even that was more than enough. Anyway, as life went on, it went out of my reach as I reached college, graduation and then post-graduation. After completing studies obviously, the next step was to do a job. Luckily, I got a good job at the beginning and my career got a kick-start. I did well and got few promotions early in my professional life. So, life was taking its own turns and I was just going with the flow. Everything was going well I was independent, self-motivated and successful to some extent. In short, I was having a pretty decent life.
But, this was neither what I wanted nor what I was meant to do and definitely this was not my dream. It was natural for me to get upset sometimes. As the time passed more and more, it did not stop at only getting upset. It turned into more than that. I started questioning myself as to what I was doing. When things started to fall out even in the workplace, I was reluctant to go to work, stopped making new friends and even stopped talking to the old ones. I cut out almost everyone from my life. My confidence was crushing; I was no longer interested in getting up in the morning and go to work. Basically, everything that can possibly go wrong was going wrong to me. While going through all these episodes, one fine day I stepped up and decided that enough is enough and I needed to do something about my life. I could no longer go through this life and hurt myself. How did I turn out to be a depressed soul? In the past, I have come out of much bigger problems in my life. I always had the courage to face the life with a smile on my face no matter what the situation was.
So, the very first thing which I did after that self-questioning scene was to search a music class. After calling few places, I did find one interesting class for myself to get enrolled. Because I knew that this was the only thing which could save me from going into depression officially and ultimately going completely insane. After this episode, I paused and thought about it, that how just a thought of learning and possibly pursuing my childhood dream could give me immense pleasure, from stabbing pain in just the matter of few seconds. Nevertheless, I was calm and happy about it.
The day came when I had to start my first lesson and just the thought of it made me elated. Since morning, I was thinking that in the evening I have to go to my music class. I was happy and chirpy all day, felt good even at the office after a long time and was waiting anxiously for the evening. I was waiting for the evening as the thirsty crow that was desperate to drink water, as a lover is waiting for a date, as a scholar student who is waiting for his result, as a barren land that was waiting for its first rain, as a dog is waiting for his owner to come home and play…….
As expected, I went to the class and felt relieved, relaxed and alive again. Although at this point, I did not know whether I will be a famous singer or will be able to perform in concerts and shows or go on a world tour and so on and so forth. But one thing was sure. That was I will be a great singer one day and I will get there as fast as possible pursuing my dream.
Nivedita is a guest contributor at Nerdynaut.